Sunday, March 29, 2015

You don't want to miss this!

I know this is ironic, you are about to read something online that certainly has disdain for the amount of time some individuals spend online, I get it. Having stated upfront the obvious I have a need to still say what I am about to say.  It may or may not apply, it may or may not be meaningful to you but I want to write this and I have a need to communicate if even if for my own sake and to remind myself of something that too often I can fall into the trap of.  What I am stating is this:  be mindful of spending so much time reading about the lives of other people that you neglect your own.  Put down the smart phones, lock the Ipad, close the laptop lid and look around you, perhaps even look into the eyes of the people who you love and who love you most dearly.  Lets face it many of us have set out to scroll facebook or instagram for a quick second only to find that 10 minutes later we are transfixed on the latest lip synch by an average Joe to some Bruno Mars hit single.  I know I know that’s quality entertainment but perhaps what you are missing most is the real thrill?  The playful eye contact from your spouse or the smile from that kid that is growing up way too fast, or maybe even the chance to engage in a conversation with a family member that could be a memory maker that you would cherish from now on.

I have worked with grieving individuals for almost 12 years.  I have learned so much from what I have heard from family members who are hurting; they long to see the ones they love who have died.  One thing I have never heard in 12 years is someone say: “Oh how I wish one more time my loved one could sit on the couch beside me while I stare endlessly into my phone and watch another funny cat video!” Nope not even once have I heard that, I know that is hard to believe but I haven’t heard it!  Instead almost every conversation is filled with “how I wish I could see their face again, hear their laugh, hear them speak my name and for me to tell them that I love them!”
So if when someone is gone and we spend so much time wishing we had more time with him or her, then maybe we should learn to enjoy the time we have?  I promise there is not one awesome pic of your friend’s new haircut that will ever compare to the touch of your partner’s embrace or the smile upon their lips.  That my friends is something that social media can’t capture.  You will not regret the moments you spend together and the stories you share, for they will comfort you in darker times.  Please don’t allow the need to keep up on everyone else’s life make you miss your own amazing truly wonderful moments.  I’m not saying drop off Facebook, cut the instagram cord, or put the twitter in the cage.  I’m just saying be mindful, manage your social media and do not allow it to manage you.

So yes please put down the smart phone.  Go listen to your children laugh, hear that absolutely hilarious line that comes out of their mouth!  Then, please don’t go and post it so the world will know.  Just go to your loved one and tell them they mean the world to you and that you love them so!